All your friends have been in committed relationships for ages. Only with you it just doesn't want to work out. With these tips, you too, as a permanently single person, will finally find the perfect partner.
Basically you are wonderful. You are smart, you have a sense of humor, you have both feet firmly on the ground and you are only moderately complicated :) Every now and then you are a little exhausting. But who isn't?
Nevertheless, you are still single. And you've been single for a long time! Even acquaintances and friends are surprised that you are permanently single.
Mostly, long-term singles are not oddballs, but attractive and lovable people. Whether shy Bambi, daredevil or workaholic - every woman wishes to have the perfect partner by her side.
But unfortunately, it seems that some never make the leap into a serious relationship. Instead, they bounce from one acquaintance to the next or simply remain completely alone.
From when is spoken of a permanent single
You've been single for over a year? That seems like an eternity to you?
Some people are actually never without a partner for more than a few months. However, this is nothing unusual.
It is difficult to say when someone is considered to be permanently single. There is no precise scientific definition. On dating portals, a person is considered to be permanently single if he or she has been without a partner for 10 years or more.
7 reasons why you are permanently single
Do you also wonder why you are permanently single? You are not alone!
There are some reasons why some people stay single for so long. However, this has nothing to do with certain character traits. Rather, different factors play together. But that doesn't mean you're doing everything wrong.
Sometimes it's just not in your hands to find the partner of your dreams. Nevertheless, you can do a few things to help your luck.
We tell you which mistakes you should avoid.
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1. you have too high demands
Your dream man should be a versatile chameleon :) Ideally businessman, super daddy and sexy lover in one.
Or do you dream of a macho man who sets the tone and is a loving husband and family man at the same time?
Both are quite unrealistic. Especially as a permanent single you wish to find someone like that without having to make many compromises.
You think you deserve a partner at eye level. The environment also conveys: The best is just good enough for you.
High expectations are generally not bad. However, you usually don't find these qualities in the person who seems perfect at first glance.
Sharpen your eye for qualities that are really important to you in a relationship. And remember: Nobody is perfect! Not even you ;)
2. you have commitment problems
Many permanent singles struggle with relationship anxiety. Do you also feel discomfort or even panic when confronted with closeness? When you are alone with a man? He might even want to kiss you? Does commitment restrict you more than it gives you pleasure?
If you constantly have in the back of your mind that there is someone better out there, then you are probably also one of those people with commitment issues.
Especially through dating portals, commitment anxiety has now become a widespread disease and can greatly hinder a happy relationship.
3. you run after the wrong people
Granted: This statement is not new. But it is a reason why many women supposedly do not find anyone. Instead of choosing the dear, reasonably adult and reasonable man, you rather choose the disrespectful, restless Mr. Wrong.
That feels more like an adventure in your opinion, doesn't it? If you think you can change him then, you're sadly mistaken.
You should not change anyone. If you intend to do that even before the relationship, it is already doomed to failure. Find a partner who will treat you with respect from the beginning.
Stop wasting your time with men who don't meet your standards. If a date doesn't feel good - NEXT!
Outside, there are plenty of men you can meet. However, this only works if you don't chase after the wrong ones.
4. it's your ex's fault that you are permanently single
Does this sound familiar: "So with my ex I used to go to this little cafe for breakfast on Sundays" or "With my ex I lived in a beautiful house, he was really a great handyman".
However, you haven't shared breakfast or a house with your ex for a long time. That's exactly why you should stop telling every date about him and scaring him away.
If you can't do that, then you're not ready for something new and should be alone for now.
Is your ex still in your closest circle of friends? Then you will have a hard time really getting away from him.
Everyone needs distance and time to process their feelings after a breakup. Only then can you draw a line and other men have a chance again.
He doesn't want a relationship - You have to do that now!
5. you are an egomaniac
Finally, you have a date! However, you don't have time for it at all. You have already planned all your free time. There are hardly any other appointments and you are not very willing to compromise.
Maybe we can meet in 3 weeks or no, because it's my cousin's birthday. But after that I could for an hour. Sound familiar? Very bad!
You've been permanently single for a long time and only think in the first person. That is completely normal for you.
However, you will soon realize that your uncompromising egoism is not well received. Especially not if you want to have a happy relationship.
6. you take too little time to get to know each other
Today, everything has to be done effectively and quickly. As much as possible should be achieved in a short time. Unfortunately, this applies not only to the Internet or the printed pages of your copier, but also to your love life.
You get to know someone and maybe even have a second date with him. There you learn about his difficult childhood or about the quarrel with his sister.
A man who has problems with his family? He is certainly exhausting and complicated. Then I'd rather look for the next one on the dating app.
Sound familiar?
Please don't be put off by the apparent flaws and take your time to get to know the man properly first.
7. you are looking for the perfect man
Sure, we can dream about our Mr. Perfect. As long as we come back to reality afterwards.
If you come around the corner with too exact ideas, you will realize very quickly that the perfect man does not exist.
Put on the brakes if your expectations are too high and cannot be met. It can be quite exciting to say goodbye to your prey pattern. Just let yourself be surprised.
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4 tips on how to end your single life
You no longer want to be alone? Good. We'll tell you the best tips to give your life a new direction. So you won't stay single for long. We promise!
Tip: The Book "It's not you" can help you finally end your single life. You can order it at Amazon.
Decide what you want
To end your single life, you first need to be clear about what you want. Do you really want a relationship or do you just feel pressured by others as a permanently single person?
Which character traits are especially important to you in a partner? Make sure that the list is not too superficial.
Appearance should not be the first priority!
Write down five main characteristics that harmonize best with your character. Then you can look specifically for your partner who combines these points.
Let bygones be bygones
If you have been permanently single after a big disappointment, try to leave the negative feelings behind. Gain emotional distance. Look at the past objectively and analytically.
What can you learn from this and what can help you further down the line? Maybe that you communicate more directly in your next relationship? Then you should take that to heart.
Emotional hurts or even fear of love should be left alone. Learn from the failures and just move on.
Take the first step
However, this does not mean that you should approach every man you like as a permanently single person. Nevertheless, you should give love a chance. If you do nothing, nothing will happen.
You can let friends set you up or you can take your luck into your own hands. Be brave and approach men you like.
Are you rather shy? Then you can also register with an online dating agency. Only with your own initiative will you manage to stop being permanently single.
Have fun flirting
You don't want to be permanently single anymore? Everyone understands that. However, you should not frantically try to find a partner. Have fun in the search. Free yourself from any pressure.
Enjoy the first dates, flirt for all you're worth, and look forward to butterflies in your stomach. But don't be too dogged about it.
Get to know your counterpart in a relaxed way. And if it was not the perfect partner, then maybe a good new friend or just a little flirt :)
Our conclusion
Don't despair! There is a lid for every pot! However, if you are a permanently single person and you search too frantically for a partner, you will not be successful.
Sometimes it just takes a little longer to find it. Maybe you imagined it a little differently. But it fits. And the ideal!
Have fun and all the best for the search! :)
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